New Outlook

I know Leila's not a big fan of this color, but I thought I needed a new outlook on life and that the old one was a little dark.

Today, by best estimations, is the 1-year-mark of my freedom from a bad relationship I was in for far too long. Fitting that today is also the day I am turning in the one thing that really does determine my future, at least as far as teaching goes. Please everyone say a "Lady will pass" prayer whenever you think about it over the next few months. We'll either have elation or a nervous breakdown in September.

My brother is not having a good go of things; he was in court for the "incident" last year, and from all accounts was not particularly pleasant with his girlfriend on Wednesday night. I talked to both of them yesterday, told her not to take it personally, told him to buy her flowers. Then I get a phone call at 10:15 last night, he nearly in tears, asking if he can come over. 15-20 minutes later he calls back, saying he's turned around, he's "Got to fix this," and that was the last I've heard from him. I was hoping he'd call me last night or today at some point...I'll probably give him a call in about an hour or so. I'm just very worried about him...he's NEVER sounded like that before. Oy. Vey.

I also had the pleasure of my driver's side window jumping the track again, neccessitating me driving home yesterday so my mechanic could fix it, and then eating dinner with my parents and having some wine.

There are some days, when the money gets tight, that I seriously consider packing it all up and going back home. But then I think about what that looks like and also realize that, as an adult, I really should be able to handle this, just make better choices. I love my parents, but I don't think a person can move back in after being on his/her own. College is different...this the real world.

My mocha and I hope everyone has a good day. I'm hoping things are settled with my brother. *worry worry*