Adventures in Culinary and Riddling

I am in love with my crockpot. After my fiasco with the layered enchilladas, I'm finally starting to get the hang of it. I've made two stews now, as well as a lovely ratatouille that went very well over pasta with some mozarella cheese. I've been quite the little chef lately; nothing extravagent, but it makes me feel like I'm accomplishing something. As I'm not doing anything with my portfolio due to lack of student work, and I don't feel like planning anything else...ah well.

In four short days I will be driving a rental car through the great state of NY with one awesome goddess to go meet another. I am SO happy. Being out of work on Monday is going to be a bit of a bitch and I hope I can work it all out, however, because of pre-CAPT stuff, my class from hell, etc. Once I see my schedule, I think it'll be a lot better; at least I'll know what kind of work to leave everyone.

All right, off to shower while I download last week's episode of Stargate SG-1 because I'm an idiot who doesn't know how to use her VCR after 6 years.


RIDDLE:

Schwarzenegger has a big one.

Michael J. Fox has a small one.

Madonna doesn't have one.

The Pope has one but doesn't use his.

Clinton uses his all the time.

Mickey Mouse has an unusual one.

Liberace never used his on women.

Jerry Seinfeld is very, very proud of his.

Cher claims that she took on 3.

We never saw Lucy use Desi's.

What is it? Answer below! (this is pretty good )












The answer is: "A Last Name."

(You didn't think I'd send you a dirty joke, did you?)

An Email from my cousin (Sorry gentlemen)

Dear Kotex,



I recently noticed that the peel-off strip of my pantiliner had a
bunch of "Kotex Tips for Life" on it.  Annoying advice such as:

- Staying active during your period can relieve cramps.
- Avoiding caffeine may help reduce cramps and headaches.
- Drink 6-8 glasses of water a day to keep you hydrated and feeling
fresh.
- Try Kotex blah blah blah other products.

Obviously the person behind this was someone who has never possessed
a functioning pair of ovaries.  Go ahead and tell a menstruating
woman TO HER FACE that drinking 6-8 glasses of water will help keep
her feeling fresh. See what happens and report back.  I'll wait
here.

While you're at it, dump out the coffee at work and remove the
chocolate from the vending machine.  I guaran-damn-tee that the
first responders will be females who just ovulated.


Look, females don't need or want tips for living on feminine hygiene
products.  Younger girls are already hearing "helpful" crap like
that from their elderly relatives.  Veteran females have already
concocted their own recipes for survival, most containing alcohol.

Printing out shit advice while sneaking in ads for the brand THAT
WAS ALREADY PURCHASED is just plain annoying, not to mention rude
and enough to send a girl running to the Always brand.

Mostly we'd like to forget that we even need these products. It's
not a fun time, but DO NOT try to cheer us up by adding smiley
faces or bunnies or flowery cutesy crap to your products or the
packaging.  Put the shit in a plain brown wrapper so we can throw
it in our carts discreetly and have it blend in among the wine and
beer. There is nothing more annoying than having a blinding pink
package announcing your uterine state to everyone in the damn
store. The ultimate goal of your product should be functional
invisibility at every stage, including the point of purchase.



So take your tips for living and shove them right up your ass.
(Try drinking six to eight glasses of water to make you feel
fresher while you're doing it!)



Ovarily Yours

Miss PMS

WTF?

My ears are clogged, my nose is stuffy, my throat is sore...

How can I POSSIBLY be getting sick again?

Early Morning Entry

I have to go to work today.

I have been up on and off since 3:25 this morning.

I don't want to go to work today.

I think I even have lunch duty today. How fair is that?

Please, someone, shoot me now.

Why am I still not in bed?

Howl's Moving Castle and The Lost King

Okay, so one of these books (The Lost King) I've read before and the other was a get-well gift from the almighty Sarah. New book first, old book last:

Weird. An interesting story, lots of sympathetic magic, but weird. I'm trying to decide if it was the British of it, or what. Jones, the author, is much more British in her structure than Rowling, and I think that may have been what threw me.

Quotes of note:

"If you knew the trouble we've had because Howl will keep falling in love like this! We've had lawsuits, and suitors with swords, and mothers with rolling pins, and fathers and uncles with cudgels. And aunts. Aunts are terrible. They go for you with hat pins."--Michael, p. 84-85

"Why can't you cure yourself with a spell?"
"Because there is no cure for a cold!"--Sophie and Howl, p. 214

And now...

I love these books. L-O-V-E, love. They make me happy when nothing else does. Find yourself a copy and read it. I finally got around to marking some of the great quotes from this first of four, and offer them to you as follows:

"The dock foreman yelled back that is men were working as fast as they could, remarking that he (the captain) would wait his turn like everyone else. The dock foreman then added what he (the captain) could do if he didn't feel like waiting."--p. 12

"Colorful, but does not alleviate the situation. And may I point out that the use of foul language is the typical response of the uneducated and unimaginative human, who has limited vocabulary---" XJ, p. 30

"Those under his command feared him as they feared God. (Perhaps more. The Creator, after all, was a nebulous being spoken of by priests who were no longer around. Derek Saga was fles and blood and in close proximity.)"--p. 57

"Robes removed disappointment and tried on anger, but immediately discarded it--one was rarely angry with a general who controlled one-twentieth of your military forces."--p. 66

"Not to mention the rumors floating around the service to the effect that Lord Sagan doesn' t like women."
"He's not discriminatory. He doesn't like men either. He doesn't like anyone, in fact."--XJ and Tusk, p. 89

"I've felt it myself, my lord, and I'm not an imaginative man."
"One of your more endearing qualities, Aks."--Admiral Aks and Derek Sagan, p. 141

"Dion realized in admiration Tusk hadn't repeated himself once in his long string of curses."--p. 145

"It wasn't that Tusk had anything against women. Tusk liked women, liked them very well, in fact....What Tusk didn't like was having a woman in the same plane, having a woman as a partner. That made him nervous. He was always inclined, when with a woman, to feel protective and fuss over her. Leap in front of her with his drawn sword--that sort of thing."--p. 154

"Ten thousand! Damn! For that kind of money I'd turn myself in."--Tusk, p. 158

"Ramming them--an old and honored tradition in the history of naval warfare."--Tusk, p. 168

"Yes, my lord. I know how highly you value beauty. What do you intend to do--blow it up?"--Maigrey Morianna, p. 183

"She had only to remember not to drink too much or she would receive a rebuke from her commander. And then, sipping at the warming liquid, Maigrey reminded herself that Sagan was her commander no longer. She could do what she damn well liked. Just what she'd mostly done anyway."--p. 198

"Tusk didn't know whether to obey or throw the chair through the door."--p. 245

"Apology accepted. I understand. I felt like hitting someone myself when I woke up this morning."--General John Dixter, p. 246

"Sagan had followed his Lord's commands because they coincided with his own desires. Now, he was beginning to see that there might be a clash of wills. The Warlord claimed to want to know the mind of God. In reality, he feared he knew and sought to change it."--p. 256

"The days passed. Sagan struggled with God. Dion searched for God. Maigrey pointedly ignored Him."--p. 259

"She could walk out that door--hell, she could walk through that door--this instant and no one except Derek Sagan could stop her."--Ibid

"Derek Sagan poured himself a glass of water and raised it in salute to the door of the chapel.
'I am well on my way to victory. Any further argument'?"--p. 263

"I've been looking for you all over, Lady Maigrey."
"I knew where I was."
"Lord Sagan's guards told me you were here."
"See? We knew where I was, then."--Dion Starfire and Maigrey, p. 325

"Then I've drunk four drinks, unless the toothpicks're breeding. Do you know, in thousands of years of progress, we've never been able to improve on the toothpick? I suppose when man was slogging his way through the swamps, beating his dinner over the head with clubs, he picked up a stick and poked what was left out of his teeth. And here we are today, traveling beyond the speed of light, proving Einstein wrong, and scattering toothpicks throughout the universe. A marvelous creation, man."--Maigrey, p. 326-7

"Strict dietary rules?"
"He prefers not to be poisoned."--Dixter and Maigrey, p. 357

"Sorry, computer. Just ignore it. It wasn't a command. I was talking to myself."
"Yes, sir. Wil you be doing that often, sir?"--Dion and Scimitar computer, p. 382

"Instead of commanding, 'Kill,' the brain could command 'Kill this way' or 'Kill that way,' which is, in warfare, the definition of strategy."--p. 393

"I might venture to state, sir, that you are far better protected here than you were in your mother's womb."
"Having been borin in a palace in the midst of a revolution, I'll grant you that one, computer."--Scimitar computer and Dion, p. 396

"A three-point landing, my lady, does not mean that you take out the deck, the bulkhead, and the overehead."--Sagan, p. 417

"What's his mental state?"
"Not good. Frightened, guilt-ridden, overwhelmed by everything that's happened to him. Just what you might expect from someone captured and wounded by the enemy. And then, of course, there are the Corasians..."
"Spare me your wit, lady."--Sagan and Maigrey, p. 425

"As I remember, you killed a man like that once, my lady."
"As I remember, my lord, I did so because he was about to kill you."--Sagan and Maigrey, p. 449

Variation on a theme

A little more negativity

Joining Leila...

...in the feeling like an ass thing.

I have no friends.

No, really. I have no friends who aren't connected to someone else.

I throw sucky parties.

My brother has to bring people to my parties to make it cool.

My brother also tries to set me up with people. Separate issue.

I feel like an absolute failure. Funny how this is not related to PMS on any level. Nope, this is just me. He Who Shall Not Be Named (Sorry, Kel for stealing the name) was right--I am a naturally depressed person. I don't think I know how to be happy. I get frustrated over things I shouldn't get frustrated over. Anyway, this failure thing is a personal as well as professional thing. I'm not going to pass my BEST portfolio, I'm never going to find someone...I'm going to be broke and have to move back in with my parents. If I thought crying would help, I would do it, but I know it won't.

As much as I hate to admit it, I DO care what people think about me, and I get the feeling everyone around me thinks I'm just a little too pathetic. There's so many things I don't have that I should at this point in my life...gah!

Pre-party-procrastination

How evil are you?Stolen from Kelly's LJ

1. screen name: LadyVad357
2. birthday: 12/05
3. place of residence: Apartment
4. what makes you happy: My cat, a good book, sleep
5. what are you listening to now/have listened to last: computer humming, "Stargate: Atlantis" theme
6. do you read my lj: the "my" in this case being Kelly's, yes
7. if you do, what is particularly good/bad about it: Good-always entertaining, bad-not enough pictures!
8. an interesting fact about you: I am becoming increasingly intolerant of the non-type A people of the world and don't know why.
9. are you in love/have a crush at the moment: Guilty as charge-ed
10. favourite place to be: the BEACH!
11. favourite lyric: Currently? "Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me?"
12. best time of the year: Summer, no work
13. weirdest food you like: Asparagus? *shrugs*
14. do farts make you laugh: Not typically, no

RECOMMEND
1. a film: "The Importance of Being Ernest"
2. a book: Star of the Guardians by Margaret Weis (technically 4 books)
3. a band, a song and an album: Amanda Marshall

PLUS
1. one thing you like about me: Your uncanny ability to read people
2. two things you like about yourself: Listening skills and... ...
3. put this in your lj (blog) so i can tell you what i think of you.

Day of rest? I don't think so

Even though today is my day off, I'm still going to be crazy, mad busy. As I haven't been to the gym since Tuesday, that is the first order of business. Then it's off to the post office to mail a book I sold on half. com (yay!) and a registration for A so she can learn to be a guitar player. Once I drag myself back to the apartment from that, and shower obviously, then I have two doctors to call, laundry to do, garbage to remove from the premisis, and the probate court to visit sometime after noon to get my paper work underway. I know, you all envy my time off. ;)

Went to celebrate Dad's bday a day late yesterday, which was nice. Sick brother appears to be recovering, and says he will be planning on making it to the "party" on Saturday, with up to four other people. A and I still don't know what we're feeding every body. Ah well.

Allergies are being annoying this morning, which does not please me on any level. Here's to hoping some abuse at the gym will clear those suckers right up.

Oh, anyone who reads this between the hours of 7:30 am and 2:10 pm, please pray for the A-ster, because she's not having a good day.

Look, flatter me!

Because the three-day-week is a good thing

I only have one more day to work, and that's tomorrow, and then I have five blessed days off. In that time, I hope to get up to Boston to FINALLY see the Star Wars exhibit, get my passport paperwork (say THAT 5 x fast) in motion, and sleep. Lots of sleep.

Our party is Saturday. We have no idea who's coming, when they'll be there, what we're feeding them, what we're wearing or how to decorate, but the party is coming anyway. Type A planner (that's me) starting to freak out. Then I remember that I really do have all day on Friday to get stuff together.

At least the living room is clean.

In other news...oh yeah, today is my dad's birthday. I called him on my way home to wish him a good one. I will be seeing him tomorrow for dinner before A and I head out to Willimantic for nachos and beer. I think. Joe is sick, so who knows if we're going or not. Anyway.

My brother has the flu. Poor thing actually WENT to the doctor yesterday he felt so crappy. I don't know if he's on meds, but I told him to drink lots of Gatorade (tm) and sleep. Like I know how to cure the flu, but it sounded really smart.

I have cooked dinner three days in a row. Of course, we have TONS of left overs (lentil soup, anyone?) but I think I can probably fit the rest of it in the freezer. Yay frozen meals made from scratch. Who rocks the Kasbah? That would be me. :)

K J Kofuske -- [adjective]: Similar to butter in texture and appearance 'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

In Honor of V.D. ...

All We Need is Some Ice Cream and a Hug

A little giggle for your Monday

On the side of my yogurt package is the phrase "Multiple Organisms Guaranteed."

Guess what I incorrectly read that as?

Somebody needs to get laid. That's all I'm saying.

In other news, A. and I watched the movie Cake yesterday. This was a very funny movie that we giggled throughout. Heather Graham and Sandra Oh star as 30 somethings who are watching everyone else become adults. Graham's character takes over a bridal magazine to help her father out. Hillarity ensues. You should watch it.

Survey, 'cause I'm snow-bound

1. What time did you get up this morning? 7:30 or so

2. Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Um..."The Producers" Maybe.

4. What is your favorite TV show? CSI, I suppose

5. What do you usually have for breakfast? Cereal, oatmeal or some form of Peanut Butter Toast

6. What is your middle name? Jane

7. Favorite food? Pizza

8. What foods do you dislike? Fish!

9. What is your favorite chip flavor? Cool Ranch...yummy

10. What is your favorite CD at the moment? Fall Out Boys

11. What kind of car do you drive? Volvo 240...I know you're jealous

12. Favorite sandwich? Roast Beef

13. What characteristic do you despise? Self-pity

14. Favorite item or outfit? My "bedazzled" jeans

15. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where? Europe.

16. What color is your bathroom? Off-white

17. Favorite brand of clothing? Gap, I suppose. I've bought a lot of stuff there lately

18. Where would you retire to? Somewhere close to the water

19. Favorite sport to watch? Football!

20. Furthest place you are sending this? It's the internet...so, the world

21. Goal you have for yourself? Pass BEST, write

22. Who do you least expect to send this back to you? No idea

23. Person you expect to send it back first? Kelly, maybe

24. When is your birthday? Dec 5

25. Favorite flowers? Tulips

26. Are you a morning person or a night person? Morning

27. What did you want to be when you were little? ballerina

28. How are you today? Snowed in and stressed out, thanks for asking.

29. What is a date on your calendar you are looking forward to? March 3...woohoo, Goddesses!

30. Who do you miss the most? See answer 29

The Passion of the Christ

As it's almost Lent, it seems somehow appropriate that I Netflixed The Passion of the Christ to watch it for the first time.

Wow.

A. and I were discussing the beginning of it, the injustice of the "bad rap" some of the players have gotten along the way, and how it's really unfair that actors who play Jesus should be so freakin' hot.

Anyway.

The "wow" more relates to how bloody (no pun intended) SAD this movie is. I mean, I know the whole story is sad...can I call it a story? You know what I mean, yes? Anyway, to see a man's life fall apart like that, to see all of those he loved suffer, turn away from him...ug. The part that almost made me sick to my stomach was the whipping scene. I litterally felt my stomach turning, and I had to look away. I didn't cry, as I'm not a big crier at movies, but I did feel..awed. Not quite religious conversion, but awed.

And, of course, then there's the non-canonical "scholar" in me who found it very curious that John nodded when Jesus said "Son, behold your Mother," and that he was the one with her the whole time. This goes back to my Christmas Eve revelation from the Book of Luke (See 12/28/2005 for refresher). I didn't like how Mary was, once again, the stoned prostitute, but we'll forgive Mr. Gibson that.

All in all, I felt it was a good movie. I do not see it as Anti-Semetic, only faithful to the story as it was portrayed in the Bible. In fact, I think it's quite clear that some of the Jews and Romans did have some serious second thoughts about the whole thing, only it was too late to call it back.

*End Movie Review. Onto Real Life*

I've been plugging away at my portfolio since about 2:00 this afternoon. After getting up and going to the gym, A. and I took a sojourn to IHOP and to Target, where I bought a new purse as I finally came to the realization that I needed more space than my current handbags were permitting. Also got "yelled at" by the mail man because our box doesn't have a number on it. Well, EXCUSE US, shouldn't that sort of thing be provided? Anyway, I'm about to hand write a sign and tape it up there until I can convince my father he wants to lend me his label maker. I've got my five lessons logged and am about to start logging my writing lessons. There's more questions than I realized, and all of them imply that you know who your two students are going to be, which I really don't. I know I've got to show my students how to do quality opening paragraphs; I think I'm going to try to find a pseudo-intellectual paper from my high school career (yes, I kept my papers) to see if I can inspire them in some way.

Now I eagerly await the goddess conference call.

A small prayer from the over-worked

Dear Lord,

Thank you for giving us Friday, because it leads to Saturday and Sunday, days that do not require any work.

Thank you also, Lord, for the three-day-weekend. I will despise it when everyone else has a February vacation, but 'lo how I will love it now.

And God bless Mommy, and Daddy, and Brudder, and Kitty too.

Amen.

The Secret History by Donna Tartt

Wow, what a book. I definitely felt profoundly under-educated in portions, but as a whole enjoyed it. It was weird, then it got weirder, then it took a sharp left turn and got down right bizarre towards the end. Greek, drinking, murder, incest...It's a hard book to explain, and I can only say that if you like character studies, this is a good choice.

And, of course, some quotes:

"From the sound of it, had I stayed in California I might have ended up in a cult or at the very least practicing some weird dietary restriction."--Richard, P. 11

"Easy to see why the Romans, usually so tolerant of foreign religions, persecuted the Christians mercilessly--how absurd to think a common criminal had risen from the dead, how appalling that his followers celebrated him by drinking his blood....Pragmatists are often strangely superstitious. For all their logic, who lived in more abject terror of the supernatural than the Romans?"--Julian, P. 41

"I was drinking Kamikazes that night. Something terrible always happens to me when I drink Kamikazes. I wreck my car, I get into fights..." Judy, P. 48

"What you need is an ice-cream float."
"You and your ice-cream floats."
"They work, I tell you. It's very scientific. Cold things are good for nausea and--"
"You're always saying that, Charles, but I just don't think it's true."
"Would you just listen to me for a second? The ice cream slows your digestion. The Coke settles your stomach and the caffeine cures your headache. Sugar gives you energy. And besides, it makes you metabolize the alcohol faster. It's the perfect food."--Francis and Charles, P. 95-6

"There was a life-or-death attempt being made near my table by a couple of Neanderthals looking to collect money for a beer blast in the sculpture studio."--Richard, P. 146

"Well, whatever one thinks of the Roman Church, it is a worthy and powerful foe. I could accept that sort of conversion with grace. But I shall be very disappointed indeed if we lose him to the Presbyterians."--Julian, P. 242

"Whatever else one says about guild, it certainly lends on diabolical powers of invention; and I spent two or three of the worst nights I had, then or ever, lying awake drunk with a horrible taste of tequila in my mouth and worry about clothing filaments, fingerprints, strands of hair."--Richard, P. 382

"I managed to get out of taking my French exam the next week, due to the very excellent excuse of having a gunshot wound to the stomach."--Richard, P. 543

"Then he had a job playing piano in a bar--which, as you can imagine, didn't work out so well."--Camilla, P. 552

Party like a rock star

Okay, well maybe not a rock star. But I channeled my inner co-ed last night and the A. and I went out dancing. We brought boys with us for "security" reasons, which proved to be good with the creepy old men, but bad when it came to the hot young men. We saw some interesting things, including two very blonde, very drunk women practically making out ON the bar. Then they climbed into a cage and took off most of their clothes. Yeah, that was kind of weird.

Happy to report there is no hangover, although thirst and a bit of a headache prevailed upon waking up. If the cats hadn't been fighting on my bed, I may have slept through the headache, but 'twas not to be.

Oh, by the way, S'mores Oatmeal is teh bomb.

I have MAD work to do today, and I have to decide just where my ass is going to watch the Super Bowl (ooh, hope I don't get fined for using the term). Could go to see my parents (free dinner!). Could go out with guy-who-I'm-just-not-that-into. Could go meet former POI because he apparently really wants me to watch it with him at a bar near his house. (It's...complicated. I can't even begin to explain how complicated I continue to make my own life. This might be A's fault though. Yes, I think we shall blame her. *Grin*)

Okay, off to create quizzes and do responsible work-related things.


Werewolf - I think you're a little confused, and

you are trying WAY to hard to be normal!

Don't worry about what others think, break

away from the norm, and ebmrace the wolf

within! The most important advise I can give

anyone is to be an individual, because inside

yourself is a beautiful and unique person

just waiting to come out.


What Paranormal Being Are YOU? {9 results + pics!!!}
brought to you by Quizilla

Our Father Who Art in a Tree by Judy Pascoe

Weird book.

Think To Kill a Mockingbird-type narrator, mixed with Australian Irish-Catholicism and add a dead father.

Like I said, weird.

Some quotes:

"My mother took a moment to accept the fact that the method of arbitration over this long-running dispute was to be a game of bridge. She nodded. Why not? It seemed fair. What other process could there be that was as just as a game of bridge?"--p. 121

"He was definitely the wrong person to die. It was God's mistake, Mum called it. A big mistake, and she spoke like she was going to get her revenge on God and take him on somehow in a duel. I knew when I saw her looking up to the heavens that she was thinking, So that's your best shot? Like it hadn't crippled her. I could imagine my mother in the ring goading Him, a featherweight light on her feet and mean, pitched against hte Almighty but not frightened by Him at all."--p. 147-148

"'I know,' I said, over and over again. 'I know, I know, I know. I just regress when I see her. I become ten.'
'Next time see if you can be eleven'."--P. 193

"Edward has the most children, and it's not a Catholic thing, he just has a lot of children and they all have perfect teeth."--p. 195

"Then there was a push and much evidence debated in the courtroom as to whether a foot was placed inside the threshold before my mother attacked."--p. 196

"She learned to shoot, and that was a turning point in her life. The power of the gun and the potention destruction, it was a comfort to her and it put her madness in perspective."--p.199

Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden and thoughts spun from

Now that I'm done, I can say that it was a good book. I was so angry at Pumpkin, as A. told me I would be, but ultimately relieved that, for the most part, Sayuri got her happy ending.

No quotes from this book, but it does make one want to read some history about the geisha, put yourself on a plane and fly to Japan or something. It was an interesting society, very different from what we know.

In other news, I'm feeling very off lately. I'm not depressed for myself, but rather depressed for some of the people around me. I'm feeling rather empathic, and I just hope that the people who I'm close to who are sad or losing hope can start to come out of it. No matter what people say, I do really think that things, ultimately, will get better. I know being "with" someone isn't the be-all and end-all of life, but to hear people say that it's not in their cards, that they won't ever have that...it makes me want to either cry or throttle the person. I haven't decided which.

But these feelings have led to me thinking about my own life, what I want and don't want, what I've got and whether it's what I need. I've become preoccupied with money again, and also am feeling very picky about men. The two are unrelated, but that's where my mind has been lately. I haven't met anyone who has excited me (while sober) in a very long time. I'm not even sure what I'm looking for, just something stimulating...mostly mentally. I'd like a challenge, a support system...I don't know what else. But whatever vibe I'm giving off is not attracting that sort of person.

Cleo says hello.

I'm really hoping Europe works out for real this year because I think I need the trip; I need to do something so ridiculously uncomfortable that I can't stop talking about it when I'm done. I have to go get my passport picture taken soon; I think I'll do that before the end of the week.

I went to the gym yesterday, then didn't go after work today. Now I'm looking at the clock, thinking about my laundry, and wondering, if I can't hit the gym when this load comes out of the dryer. I know I NEED to work out, especially after the way I've been eating, but I'm not feeling particularly motivated to do so. Maybe it's the winter weather that makes me want to curl up in a ball and just watch TV until my eyes rot out of my head. I should be working on stuff for school, or something, but there's nothing really making me want to do that, either. Even my portfolio...I put SO much energy into worrying about it in November that now, suddenly, I just don't care. And I know I should, because it's rather important to my continued life as a teacher.

And what happens if I fail? Do I really have anything to fall back on? The answer is no. After this, I'm fresh out of ideas. I just hope to God, or whomever else is listening, that I get through this successfully and then I can worry about other things. I'm sort of looking for a new job, but part of me wants to just stick it out and see what happens. If there's a regime change from on high, or even just within our building, things might get better. There have been days lately when I've hated it though. Not the actual teaching, because I'm starting to get comfortable with that finally. But the parents, the administration...gah, it all makes me so furious sometimes.

Please, all of you who plan on having children, do NOT coddle them. Teach them responsibility from an early age. Understand that, 99.99% of the time, your child's teacher is in the right. Yes your child is special, but that doesn't make him/her perfect. My job would be much easier if they were all perfect.

Off to rescue laundry and then venture out of the house to go to the gym at 6pm. Wish me luck!