No Holla-back Girl

Okay, these are the qualities of a good babysitting job, especially once you're, you know, an adult:

1. The kids are in bed by 8:00, leaving you to watch 2hrs of CSI in peace.
2. They offer you beer/wine before you leave
3. Upon their return, they pay you $50 for sitting in their house and breathing their air because their children are PERFECT.
4. You get to sing "Hollaback Girl" with the wife.
5. They make you drink champagne with them
6. They offer you a glass from another bottle of champagne

Today...later today (it's 12:12 AM at the moment), I am going to put my car in MY name for the first time. This is actually rather exciting. I'm seriously considering vanity plates because, as my mother pointed out, those suckers can go anywhere, so why have normal plates when you can stand out? Of course, this is going to involve the DMV for probably numerous hours, which is best represented by a huge, sucking vacuum, but whatever.

Cleo says hello to everyone.

http://www.liquidgeneration.com/poptoons/tomcruise_katieholmes.asp

Artemis Fowl

I finished reading the first Artemis Fowl book last night, so I thought I'd share my...er, thoughts on the matter.

(Before I truly begin...what Irish family names their SON "Artemis?" Honestly!)

This book falls into a weird genre, kind of like A Series of Unfortunate Events. It's written for children/young adults, but some of the stuff in here, the jokes and what not, are higher up than that. The pacing is always really quick. My best analogy would be if you had a kid who thought he/she was "too old" for Harry Potter or had the attention span of a gnat, you'd give him/her this series. The story goes quickly, there aren't that many characters to keep track of, but things get blowed up and, oh yeah, fart jokes.

Amusing anecdotes follow:

"Thankfully, the rest of the world assumed the Irish were crazy, a theory that the Irish themselves did nothing to debunk."--p. 69 (hee hee)

"Definitely a girl. Pretty too. In a pointy sort of way."--Artemis Fowl, p. 76

"Plus, I did my basic training in Ireland. Back in the top hat and shillelagh days."--Commander Root, p. 84

"Time to attempt a word. Something short and pertinent. Help, she decided, would be the one to go for."--p. 97

"If I win, I'm a prodigy. If I lose, then I'm crazy. That's the way history is written."--Artemis, p. 121

"I hacked into Interpol. Not too difficult, I can tell you. They might as well have put out a welcome mat..."--Foaly, p. 123

"Holmes, Moriarty, they both look the same with the flesh scorched off their skulls."--Root, p. 126

"A dubious individual, even by Artemis Fowl's standards. As if this account didn't already suffer from an overdoes of amoral individuals."--p. 161

"No self-respecting criminal mastermind would be caught dead even using the word lollipops."--p. 216

"Banter! The human was trying to engage a troll in macho repartee!"--p. 236



create your own visited countries map
or vertaling Duits Nederlands

Tee hee

Went to a conference today. I think I'm learning stuff, and I think I may have an idea on what to do for my portfolio. Yay!

Okay, so I was driving home in the pouring rain, thinking about the goddesses, and this song came on the radio, by Bowling for Soup. So I post the lyrics (edited for spelling) because...well, it made me amused.


"Ohio (Come Back To Texas)"

She said she needed a break
a little time to think
but then she went to Cleveland
with some guy named Leelan
that she met at the bank

There's nothing wrong with Ohio
except the snow and the rain
I really like Drew Carey
and I'd love to see the Rock n' Roll Hall of Fame

So when you're done doing whatever
and when you're through doing whoever
you know Denton County will be right here waiting for you....

Come back to Texas
It's just not the same since you went away
Before you lose your accent
and forget all about the Lonestar State
There's a seat for you at the rodeo
and I've got every slow dance saved
Besides the Mexican food sux north of here anyway

I think I made a mistake
It's not that easy to take
She went to make a deposit
then she cleaned out her closet
Guess I'll sit here and wait

For her to come back home (I'd wish you come back home)
it shouldn't take very long (so long so long)
I bet she misses the sunrise
and misses the fruit flies but I could be wrong

So when you're done doing whatever
and when you're through doing whoever
you know Denton County will be right here waiting for you....

Come back to Texas
Its just not the same since you went away
I bet you missed your exit
and drove right on through the Lone Star State
There's a seat for you at the rodeo
and I've got every slow dance saved
Besides the Mexican food sux north of here anyway

Troy Aikmen wants you back
Willie Nelson wants you back
NASA wants you back
and the Bush twins want you back
and Pantera wants you back
and Blue Bell wants you back

I got a premonition
I'm taking a petition
and the whole state's gonna sign

Come back to Texas
Its just not the same since you went away
Before you lose your accent
and forget all about the Lone Star State
There's a seat for you at the rodeo
and I've got every slow dance saved

Come back to Texas
Its just not the same since you went away
Before you lose your accent
and forget all about the Lone Star State
There's a seat for you at the rodeo
and I've got every slow dance saved
Besides the Mexican food sux north of here anyway
Besides the Mexican food sux north of here anyway
Besides the Mexican food sux north of here anyway



create your own visited states map
or check out these Google Hacks.

Long Survey...nothing of note today

1. Name: Karen
2. Your Nick Name: Kar, K, Lady
4. Place of Birth: A hospital? J/K--Meriden, CT
5. Zodiac Sign: Sagitarrius
6. Male or Female: Female
7. Age: 24
8. School: Done!
9. Occupation: Teacher
10. Residence: Soon to be apartment
11. Screen Name: LadyVad357--Good ol' reliable

__Your Appearance___

12. Hair Color: nothing-to-write-home-about-brown
13. Hair Long or Short: Medium length
14. Eye Color: typically blue
15. How Do your Nails look: Uneven
17. Do you have a crush on someone right NOW (truthfully): It's not even a crush it's more like...a mild interest
18. Do you Like yourself: On good days
20. Do You Think you’re attractive: I see some women and say "Thank God I don't look like her"
21. Piercings: Two holes in each ear.
22. Tattoo: Not yet...:)
23. Righty or Lefty: Righty

___Your 'Firsts'___

24. First RollerCoaster: Either Lake Compounds or the now-defunct Riverside
25. First cell phone: Nokia
26. First best friend: Katie
27. First Award: May have been physical fitness in 6th grade...can you believe it?
28. First Sport You Joined: Uh, does dance count? ;)
29. First pet: Lucy (cat) and Pearl (dog)
30. First vacation: Florida...or Canada
31. First Concert: 104-Fest...BNL!
32. First True Love: True love? Brett

___ Favorites___
33. Movie: The Empire Strikes Back.
34. TV Show: Currently? Huh. I don't think I really HAVE a favorite. "Voyager" was the last one I wrote fanfic for on a regular basis
35. Color: Blue.
36. Bands: BNL, Goo Goo Dolls, MB20
37. Song: Currently? "You Had Me"--Joss Stone
38. Food: Egg rolls, pizza...
39. Drink: Wine
40. Candy: Peppermint patty
41. Sport: Football--go Vikings!
42. Fav sport To Watch: See above.
43. Brand Of Clothing: Does it fit and not deplete my bank account? Score!
44. Stores: Kohls, book stores, Target
45. School Subject: English
46. Animal: cat
48. Magazines: Star Wars: Insider.

___Currently___

49. Eating: I just had steak...watch my cholesterol rise
50. Drinking: Water...which I left in the kitchen
52. Online?: Uh....yes?
53. Listening to: CSI on my TV
54. Thinking: Gotta pack, gotta pack...should be writing...gotta pack...
55. Wanting: Uh, this is a family show kids...;)
56. Watching: see "Listening" above

___Your Future___

58. Want Kids?: Yes.
59. Want to Get Married?: Yes.
60. Careers in Mind: Teacher, writer, Mommy...maybe Department Head

__Which is Better With The Opposite Sex___

67. Cute or Sexy: Cute, which quickly turns into Sexy
68. Lips or Eyes: Eyes; lips can be taught
69. Hugs or Kisses: Am I having a good day? Then a kiss
70. Short or Tall: Taller than me
71. Easygoing or serious: Someone who knows when to be either
72. Romantic or Spontaneous: As long as the spontaneity is expected from me...we'll go with that
73. Muscles or bones: He can't way less than me ;)
74. Sensitive or Loud: Not loud...but I don't see how the two are opposite.
75. Hook-up or Relationship: Relationship.
76. Sweet or Caring: Aren't they kind of the same?
77. Trouble Maker or Hesitant One: Well, I'd rather him not call me regularly to bail him out

___Have You Ever___

78. Kissed a Stranger: No
79. Drank Alcohol: Yes
80. Smoked: Gross
81. Ran Away From Home: Not that I know of
82. Broken a Bone: Yes, a toe
83. Got an X-ray: Oh yes...
84. Broken Someones Heart: Yup.
85. L0VED SOMEONE: Yes
86. Turned Someone Down: Yes
87. Cried When Someone Died: Yes
88. Cried At School: Yes, once while working

___Do You Believe In___

89. God: Yupper
90. Miracles: Of course.
91. Love At First Sight: I’m open to the possibility
92. Ghosts: Having litteraly been touched by one, yes
93. Aliens: Yes
94. Soul Mates: Yes.
95. Heaven: Yes
96. Hell: Yup
98. Kissing on The First Date: Depends on this is the 2nd time you've seen the guy, or if you've had a friendship you're taking to the next level
99. Horoscopes: Sometimes they're accurate

___Answer Truthfully___

100. Is There Someone You Want But You Know You Can't Have?: Gerard Butler ;)

Literary Harlots and Mary Sues

Okay, I just finished reading Queen of Camelot by Nancy McKenzie, which encompasses both "The Child Queen" and "The High Queen." As one must have gathered by now, this is a story about King Arthur, told from Guenivere's point of view.

I have come to the conclusion that I despise Guenivere more than Helen of Troy. Helen's infidelity, her decision, is excusable in some ways, considering her husband:

1. married her for political reasons
2. was significantly older
3. never loved her.

Of course some young buck coming in and sweeping her off her feet...probably not the best decision a queen can make, but well...yeah.

Guenivere, however...ug. Yes, Arthur marries her for political reasons, but QUICKLY grows to love her, and she him. He doesn't turn her out when she can't have kids and treats her like a person, not just a woman. For someone who represents the Goddess on Earth, she is a LOUSY representation.

Lancelot. I mean, what can you say about this guy? The ONLY good version of him was in King Arthur and that's because he DIED before he could do any real damage. It's really simple enough--if you have trouble fighting temptation, stay away from that which tempts you. Yes, you're the Queen's Protector; that doesn't mean you have to spend every BLOODY SECOND of the day with her when the King's not around. If she gets into a jam, you help her out. You make sure she has plenty of armed guards. You don't meet with her alone, anywhere, if she inflames you that much.

The problem with this book also partially revolves around Mary Sue. Mary Sue, for those of you who do not know, is a female character inserted into a fandom that is an author's idealized version of herself. (This can happen with men, he is called Gary Stu, but most often happens with girls.) If ever there was a Mary Sue, the Guenivere in this book is it. She is beyond beautifyl, which is partially to be expected, 'cause, hi, Guenivere. But every man who meets her falls in love with her, and she's so perfectly tom-boy-ish, you want to scream. But for all her "strength" she cries at the drop of a hat and can't figure out the most logical thing to do, which is to STAY AWAY FROM LANCELOT. She also can't keep her mouth shut when talking to her maids, revealing state secrets and openly confessing her love for good ol' Lance. Ug.

What's worse about this book is that EVERYBODY knows, even Arthur, they talk about it to her face, and yet people continue to let these two get together in private or EXTREMELY underchaperoned situations. I know you can't boss the High Queen around, but Lancelot...couldn't Bedwyr or someone just pull him aside and say "Look, buddy, whatever you have to say to her, you should be able to say in the King's Council." The whole KINGDOM is at fault for what happens, because nobody had the good sense to say "Stop; Bad Idea."

Back to good ol' Gwen. She drives me batty. I know I've read books where I've liked her, but this one...ug! And she was the narrator; the whole thing is in the first person point of view! And I STILL couldn't like her. I wanted to throttle her pretty little neck and say "You are married to the High FUCKING King of Britain. Why is this not enough for you? You are a selfish witch, ruining two men's lives."

In the stories where Morgan/Morgaine/Morgause/whoever casts a spell to ruin them, this behavoir is slightly more acceptable--removal of free will and what not. But in this version, no, she just made a ton of bad decisions, and couldn't see to stop. Seriously, who talks about their LOVER with their HUSBAND? She would do this and...and...no words...too angry.

In my version of this story, if I ever get it written, Guenivere burns. Yup, Lancelot doesn't come to save her. She burns in the fire like she ought to, because she ruined the best thing Britain had going for it.

/end rant

One Week!

By this time a week from now I shall be...traveling. On an airline I've never flown, in airports to which I have never been. All by myself. Now I panic. Pray for me, please.

Went shopping with Mum yesterday. Came back with stuff for the apartment AND a new bathing suit. It is a green one piece, and I think I look quite fetching in it. It has a weird claspy thing I have to fight with to get it on but whatever. It's also a size 8, so go me.

Anathema and I went out for dinner last night, then crashed a birthday party at Margaritas. There was this really cute guy there, who was in Iraq and is studying to be a History teacher. He was very funny. I think I may have developed a bit of a crush.

But the real reason I'm posting is that I finished two books and totally neglected your eyes from reading amusing things out of them.

First The Grim Grotto, Book the Eleventh in A Series of Unfortunate Events:

"When you are invited to dine, particularly with people you do not know very well, it always helps to have a conversation opener, a phrase which here means 'an interesting sentence to say out loud in order to get people talking'. Although lately it has been more and more difficult to attend dinner parties without the evening ending in gunfire or tapioca..."--p. 91-2

"It is one of life's bitterest truths that bedtime so often arrives just when things are really getting interesting."--p. 109


Okay, now on to Till We Have Faces by C.S. Lewis. Sarah bought me this book when I was in TX last time and told me I HAD to read it. It's a new version of the Cupid and Psyche story, told from one of the sister's points of view. Kinda like...Wicked, I'd imagine, though I've never read that book. (Tangent--Going to see the musical with my mother in December. Whee.) Anyway, the book was...interesting. I don't know if I would call the narrator entirely credible, but towards the end of the book, she recognizes that about herself. Her father, however, is a complete ass.

"This is where men, even the trustiest, fail us. Their heart is never so wholly given to any matter but that some trifle of a mean, or a drink, or a sleep, or a joke, or a girl, may come in between it and them and then (even if you are a queen) you'l get no more good out of them till they've had their way."--Orual, p. 149-50

"Who that knows men would doubt it? They're harder, but we're tougher. They do not live longer than we. They do not weather sickness better. Men are brittle."--Ansit, p. 261

And that is all from the land of the Lady. I am now off to enjoy the pool, as the weather is nigh around 100 and what ELSE should I be doing?

Funky Town

I had this very weird dream last night, which involved my friend Katie's dead father, her wedding plans, a dinner, nudity, a facial, and Paris Hilton's brother.

*shrug*

So last night (before I started drinking) I agreed to babysit so my parents could go out with the couple that owns the package store. This happens next Thursday. I am actually quite excited about this, mostly because I haven't been around little kids in a long time.

Then, after I started drinking, I think I agreed to go somewhere with Anathema tonight. Of course, I don't really remember the details, although our friend Mark was involved in some fashion. I think. It's all a little foggy. So Anathema needs to call my cell phone when she reads this and remind me of what I agreed to. ;)

This place is REALLY funny. My friend Sarah found it. Even my mother chuckled.

There was a headline in the paper today: "GOP Sensing Resistance to Iraq War." The GOP JUST figured this out? *headdesk* Also, why do the people in Hartford keep shooting at each other? Can't they just...stop? It doesn't seem like it should be that difficult a thing NOT to do. The rest of us go years repressing our urge to shoot people.

Your Linguistic Profile:

55% General American English

35% Yankee

5% Dixie

5% Upper Midwestern

0% Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

Your Inner European is Italian!

Passionate and colorful. You show the world what culture really is.

Who's Your Inner European?

Even Sith like cookies

Darth Vader in my bed...Does it get any better? 

That's right, folks, my Darth Vader cookie jar arrived today, and I am very excited about it. Probably more excited than I ought to be, considering it is JUST a cookie jar, and I don't really eat cookies anymore. But whatever. I wish his eyes were red, but other than that...

Having a rather productive day considering I'm on vacation. I have gone to the gym, gone to Goodwill, finished coat one on my table and vacuumed the pool. Now I am going to enjoy said pool because I can. I think I need a new bathing suit (well, I have three, but two don't really fit any more). I HATE bathing suit shopping.

Oh, I got a surprise from Dendera in the mail today too. Yay for prizes. Sar, I figure I'll just bring your prize with me, 'cause I'll be there in 9 days! West Coast, watch out!

Your Element Is Air

You dislike conflict, and you've been able to rise above the angst of the world. And when things don't go your way, you know they'll blow over quickly. Easygoing, you tend to find joy from the simple things in life. You roll with the punches, and as a result, your life is light and cheerful. You find it easy to adapt to most situations, and you're an open person. With you, what you see is what you get... And people love that!

What's Your Element?

The Picture of Dorian Gray

Read it? If you don't get lost in late-19th Century prose, you should give it a whirl.

Some hilights:

"I choose my friends for their good looks, my acquaitences for their good characters, and my enemies for their good intellects."--Lord Henry, p. 10

"But I can't help detesting my relations. I suppose it coems from the fact that none of us can stand other people having the same faults as ourselves."--Lord Henry, p. 11

"She behaves as if she was beautiful. Most American women do. It is the secret of their charm."
"Why can't these American woemn stay in their own country? They are always telling us that it is the Paradise for women."
"It is. That is the reason why, like Eve, they are so excessively anxious to get out of it." --Lord Henry and Uncle George (?), p. 38

"I can stand brute force, but brute reason is quite unberable. There is something unfair about it. It is hitting below the intellect."--Lord Henry, p. 42

"Most people become bankrupt through having invested too heavily in the prose of life. To have ruined one's self over poetry is an honor."--Lord Henry, p. 57

"A great poet, a really great poet, is the most unpoetical of all creatures. But inferior poets are absolutely fascinating. The worse their rhymes are, the more picturesque they look. The mere fact of having published a book of second-rate sonnets makes a man quiet irresistible. He lives the poetry he cannot write. The others write the poetry they dare not realize."--Lord Henry, p. 60

"All that it really demonstrated was that our future would be the same as our past, and that the sin we had done once, with loating, we would do many times, and with joy."--p. 63

"The reason we all like to think so well of other is that we are all afraid for ourselves. The basis of optimism is sheer terror."--Lord Henry, p. 79

"Women are wonderfully practical, much more practical than we are. In situations of this kind we often forget to say anything about marriage, and they always remind us."--Lord Henry, p. 81

"It is not good for one's morals to see bad acting."--Lord Henry, p. 89

"Besides, women were better suited to bear sorrow than men. They lived on their emotions. They only thought of their emotions. When they took lovers, it was merely to have someone with whom they could have scenes."--Dorian Gray, p. 95

"Never trust a woman who wears mauve, whatever her age may be, aor a woman over thirty-five who is fond of pink ribbons."--Lord Henry, p. 106

"The husbands of very beautiful women belong to the criminal class."--Lord Henry, p. 182

"He atones for being occasionally somewhate overdressed by being always absolutely overeducated."--Lord Henry, p. 186

"Beer, the Bible, and the seven deadly virtues have mad our England what she is."--Lord Henry, p. 199

"As for omens, ther eis no such thing as an omen. Destiny does not send us heralds. She is too wise or too cruel for that."--Lord Henry, p. 208-9

"My dear boy, they have only been talking about it for six weeks, and the British public are really nto equal to the mental strain of having mroe than one topic every three months."--Lord Henry, p. 217

"To get back my youth, I would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early or be respectable."--Lord Henry, p. 221

"You will soon be going about like the converted and the revivalist, warning people against all the sins of which you have grown tired."--Lord Henry, p. 224

Obviously, Wilde felt that Henry should have all the good lines.

*is going to Oregon is just a few weeks*

You May Be a Bit Borderline ...

Your mood swings make a roller coaster look tame! When you're up, you're a little bit crazy... And when you're down, your whole world is crashing Scary thing is, these moods can change by the minute!

What Personality Disorder Are You?

You Are the Very Gay Winnie the Pooh!

Come on, he doesn't wear pants! And he's a little too obsessed with Christopher Robin

What Gay Childhood Icon Are You?

Happy Coamhain!

I just wanted to wish everyone a happy solstice. I hope your day is filled with a little bit of pagan magic.

You Are A Hornbeam Tree

You are a reserved person, looking in from the outside. Naturally attractive, you take good care of your looks. You are not egoistic, and you make life as comfortable as possible. You look for kindness in others - though you are seldom happy with yourself. A bit mistrusting and unsure, you dream of being swept away by someone unusual.

What is Your Celtic Horoscope?

School's Out for Summer!

Okay, well, almost. I actually DO have to go in tomorrow, but I get to sleep in an extra half an hour because I really don't have much to do in my classroom. Huzzah. I'm thinking that I may go see Episode III tomorrow after work. Yes, all by myself. What? *pats chest in very alpha-male way*

I got my two shawls in the mail today. I cannot wait to wear them somewhere. I need to increase my social life so I can wear all my cool clothes somewhere. Anathema mentioned something about a party this weekend, so one of my cute wardrobe pieces may get a workout.

I have about half a dozen boxes to start packing things into. If only I could think of where to start with the packing. Knick knacks, I suppose; it will probably help with the deciding what I really need. Or I could start packing up books I don't plan on reading between now and then. I dunno, it's all so very confusing. I think this weirds me out more than the actual leaving-the-nest business.

Okay, quizzy bits. The second one you can only do if you have a LJ, but I thought it was funny so I decided to share it here. Incidentally, the lj has a new story-bit up. *coughcough*

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is low. Even if you're tempted, you'd try hard not to do it.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as something you can get or discard anytime. You're feeling self centered.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

Writer True Are You by Illidan
Username
You Writer Pseudonym
Burned-Out Genre you persist in desecrating
Holds book-burnings in your honor	aregan
Dedicates their entire life to your scrawlings	sue_parsons
Has deviant sexual fetishes over your characters	sreya
Maligns your writing behind your back	bulky_monster
Plagiarizes your work with wild abandon	jediowl
When your Genius will be universally recognized	June 11, 2742
Your Secret Writer Superpower	The depraved cackling emanating from your mouth forms nefarious inscriptions in your notebook.
Money you'll pay to get your book self-published	$4,177
Your chance of making Oprah's Book Club: 62%
Quiz created with MemeGen!

Lyrics and other amusing things

Alcohol - Brad Paisley
I can make anybody pretty, I can make you believe any lie
I can make you pick a fight with somebody twice your size

Well, I've been known to cause a few breakups
And I've been known to cause a few births
I can make you new friends or get you fired from work

And since the day I left Milwaukee, Lyncheburg Bourbon, France
Been makin' the bars with lots of big money and helpin' white people dance
I got you in trouble in high school but college, now, that was a ball
You had some of the best times, you'll never remember with me
Alcohol, alcohol

I got blamed at your wedding reception for the best man's emberrasing speech
And also for those naked pictures of you at the beach
I've influenced kings and world leaders, I helped Hemingway write like he did
And I'll bet you a drink or two that I can make you put that lampshade on your head

'Cause since the day I left Milwaukee, Lyncheburg Bourbon, France
Been makin' a fool out of folks just like you and helpin' white people dance
I am medicine and I am poison, I can help you up or make you fall
You had some of the best times, you'll never remember with me
Alcohol

And since the day I left Milwaukee, Lyncheburg Bourbon, France
Been makin' the bars with lots of big money and helpin' white people dance
Yeah, I got you in trouble in high school but college, now, that was a ball
You had some of the best times, you'll never remember with me
Alcohol, alcohol

You Know You're From Connecticut When...

You have hiked up a big hill or small mountain at least once for a keg party. You never went to a bar in high school. You thought that the only highways were 91 and 84. You thought everyone couldn't buy beer after 8 pm You actually thought that Hartford was big You or someone you know has attended UCONN You drive a JETTA You still think that the Whalers are cool. You have been to Misquamicut and to that little hot dog place. There is a farm within miles of your house You thought bars were really for people over 21 Your high school thanksgiving football game was the highlight of your school year. You don't have an accent when you talk You have known at least 2 preppy rich kids from Fairfield who listen to Phish. You love Hilton Kaderli and your mom cried when he retired. UConn basketball rules and no one can tell you different You have deer in your backyard. You didn't drink or do drugs until 10th grade. You still don't understand why people say that Connecticut is the richest state..... Your best friend went to Central, Western, Eastern and finally Manchester Community College. Your mom works at Travelers and your dad works at Pratt and Whitney. You have been drunk at the Meadows and don't remember the concert. You go to Riverside at least once a summer Your parents actually care about the Governor, the Patriots coming to Hartford, the lights at Christmas in Hartford & Channel 3 news. You have a UCONN flag outside of your house year round You think New Jersey was a toxic waste dump You hang out at Denny's You've partied at bonfires You have at least one friend with a pickup You think everyone works tobacco in the summer You think Old Lyme is a shore town You've been to Cape Cod You think the Connecticut River is endless The town diner is the only place open after midnight. You have at least 4 friends who drive Jeep Grand Cherokees You root for all the New York sports teams If anybody asks, you're from just outside of New York. You've never looked at a public bus schedule You have both girlfriends and guyfriends with the same name as you. You go to the diner late night to post party. You think New Haven is the worst ghetto you've ever seen You can proudly tell an outsider about Nutmeg. You weekend either on the Cape or Rhode Island at a summer home You have said... " I'm in a good location... Between both Boston and New York." You can carry on a conversation about Mike Liut, Torrie Robertson, and the Brass Bonanza. You have to explain Cow Tipping to people from out of state. When you go to a real city, you sincerely feel bad for every poor / homeless person you see. You get pissed at anyone who doesn't know how to drive in the snow. You can name all the members of the UCONN men's and women's basketball teams. You still can't find your way in Hartford (except for that bar area near Union Station.) You hold the door open for someone and they don't say "Thank You." You own a golden or a lab (used to...) You own real Oakley's You only know Westbrook and Clinton because they have good outlets You don't think you're a yuppie, but the rest of the country does You only ski in Vermont or out West Your mother is the head of the PTA There is absolutely nothing to do in the winter You live twenty minutes form either an Abercrombie & Fitch, J. Crew, or GAP. You sail, or know someone who does. You don't understand why everyone else has not been to Europe. You can't get through the week with out a Coffee Coolata Your family owns more cars than legal drivers School attire is a North Face fleece jacket, a North Face Fleece or L.L. Bean back pack, a plaid shirt, khakis, and Doc Martins. Summer footwear is either Reefs or Birks You carry your keys on a carabineer, but you don't know how to rock climb. You feel for the homeless, but are not willing to give up the golf course land to develop a homeless shelter. As a child you took horseback riding, golfing, tennis and swimming lessons. You grew up wanting to be a lifeguard You own every DMB CD The state is so small you know where all the speed traps are You can't understand why people don't understand what your talking about when you refer to a "package" store You went to prep school even though your public schools are awesome People actually wear sweaters around their necks You've never taken public transportation You know of at least one person who's house was totally trashed after a huge party Your mom drives a Volvo wagon You have at least one friend whose house was built in the 1800's You live in a huge colonial You know at LEAST one person who has been pulled over and found to have weed in their car The only overcrowding is of deer in your backyard Your house would cost half as much in any other state Your wardrobe contains at least three pairs of cords and five wool sweaters Half of your friends are from another town because yours is so small At least one of your friends has a sick house right on the water You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Connecticut.

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Night Driving

Kind of like night swimming, only it's not a song by that band I hate, and I was completely clothed.

Did anyone ever notice that your car always seems to be going faster at night? I was driving on Rte 2 and looked down to discover I was 10 miles under the speed limit, but I thought I was doing 65. Then when I sped up to 65, I thought I was going to crash into some sort of furry woodland creature and thus meet my untimely death.

Anathema and I watched The Phantom of the Opera and The Stepford Wives tonight. What I noticed about Raoul and the Phantom is this--Raoul sings love songs, you bring him home to meet the 'rents. The Phantom...he sings to get you horny and have his way with you in the back corner of the club. (Incidentally, my love for the Phantom and my love for Darth Vader blossomed at roughly the same time.) You feel safe with Raoul; you feel naughty and alive with the Phantom. (This is, of course, only the movie/musical version. The book is a whole nother ball-o-wax. Did I just mix metaphors? It's 1:46 in the morning. Whatever.)

So those are some of my thoughts. I'm going to go back to the vaguely homo-erotic tale of an aging painting as I drift off to dreamland.

Your Star Wars Pickup Line

"If I said you had a mint first-edition, still-in-box action figure, would you hold it against me?"

What's Your Star Wars Pickup Line?

Your Birthdate: December 5

With a birthday on the 5th of the month you are inclined to work well with people and enjoy them. You are talented and versatile, very good at presenting ideas. You may have a tendency to get itchy feet at times and need change and travel. You tend to be very progressive, imaginative and adaptable. Your mind is quick, clever and analytical. A restlessness in your nature may make you a bit impatient and easily bored with routine. You may have a tendency to shirk responsibility

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Rather Ashamed

Do you know I actually got a bit misty-eyed at graduation last night? Yeah, it was weird. I got hugs from four of my senior boys who wouldn't have been walking across the stage if I wasn't such a wonderful human being. Hopefully they'll remember that.

Monday is my last day with the kids. To celebrate, Mom and I went out and I bought three new books for myself, two for my mother and one for Father's Day. (My father wanted, get this, a Rachel Rae 30-Minute-Meal cookbook. Anyone else laughing? Good.) One of the books I picked up is about 17th-century Japan (aren't the goddesses proud of me?) and my mother picked up a similar one by the same author, which entertained me.

Of course, while I was at B&N, I forgot to get gift certificates for two of the women I work with--my mentor and the special ed teacher who helped me maintain my sanity with those hellacious sophomores. But as I may be going to see the infamous Anathema tonight, perhaps I can convince her to go back to B&N with me so I can purchase those, plus a CD for my father that my mom said he might like.

I am about a third of the way through The Picture of Dorian Gray. I have never read any Oscar Wilde before, so this is an interesting adventure for me. He is very witty, but we haven't gotten to the "meat" of the story. I will tell you, however that Lord Harvey is a horribly manipulative man and I don't like him one bit. More on that, of course, when I'm done with the book.

Here are some pointless quizzes to entertain the masses: I'm hoping to have some writing done before too long, so you'll have to check the OTHER place and, oh, I don't know...TELL ME IF I SUCK OR NOT! *cough* Moving on.

Your Expression Number is 7

Very intelligent, you are usually thinking, introspecting, or analyzing. You have a good mind, and you are especially good at finding out the truth. Very little ever escapes your observation and deep understanding. You tend to obsess over wisdom and hidden truths. You are likely to become a authority on any subject you undertake. Operating on a different wavelength, most people don't know you that well. Very logical and rational, at times you tend to lack emotion. So much so, that you often have times coping with emotional situations. You are not very adaptable - you may tend to be overly critical at times.

What's Your Expression Number?

Slow and Steady

Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It'd really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment. They expect you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then usually decide against it.

How Do People See You?

Wacky Weekday Weather

So, two days ago, it was all I could do to keep my clothes on it was so hot. Now I'm scrounging for sweaters. WTF??

I just realized that my "DVD-burner" actually burns CDs too. Whee!

We've seen our tentative schedules for next year. It looks...doable. I got an honors junior class, and possibly and honors sophomore class as well. My DH did say I was best suited for that bracket of learners. Hopefully they will behave and my BEST portfolio will glow electric.

I have bills to pay, but instead of that I'm going out tonight to see my soon-to-be-married-childhood-friend and her new place...and fiance I would imagine. Anyone know what kind of wine goes with sloppy joes? *shrugs* Me neither.

I thought I had all this really interesting stuff to discuss, but now I can't remember any of it. My brain is so mushy from work this week...I cannot WAIT for next Monday.

Star Wars Horoscope for Sagittarius

You are superbly wise and have been known to spread your wisdom widely. You are impatient and pushy when people take your teachings too lightly. And your philosophical side always peeks through. Star wars character you are most like: Yoda

What is Your Star Wars Horoscope?

Part Expert Kisser

You're a kissing pro, but it's all about quality and not quantity You've perfected your kissing technique and can knock anyone's socks off And you're adaptable, giving each partner what they crave When it comes down to it, your kisses are truly unforgettable

Part Shy Kisser

You *do* love to kiss, once your comfortable with it And that means knowing the person you're kissing pretty well You usually don't make the first move when it comes to making out But you've got plenty of intensity in return

What Kind of Kisser Are You?

No need to report that until we have something to report.

Okay, besides the visiting relatives and the heat, my life is being pulled in all sorts of ways as I attempt to finish the school year. I just re-found my "End of the Year" checklist--I actually have to have my dept. head sign off on this. *sigh* State jobs!

8 out of 17 Tech schools closed today...but not mine. Nope, my 90 degree classroom didn't warrant sending kids home early. *MFs*

My car wouldn't start yesterday. At all. I mean, not even so much as an engine turn over. My students would have blushed at the things coming out of my mouth. Good thing we have the spare vehicle and that it had gas. Battery replaced (it was at least 5 years old) and now she runs again. Yay!

Also, was a big hit with the 6mos-4yr set yesterday. I walked into the house in question and the four year old girl came RUNNING up to me and hugged my leg. I have never had anyone so excited to see me...except perhaps the fellow goddesses after our years-long separation. Anyway, her little brother was amused by my fish faces. I watched Disney movies in Swedish; I know you're all jealous. Swedish, incidentally, sounds and looks a lot like German.

Oh, Goddesses, if we want to travel to Spain next year, the grandparents of the 4 year old live there and their son assures me we could crash free of charge. For what it's worth.

We should all give my friend Rob a BIG round of applause--the man is trying to quit smoking. He has been a smoker for the 6 years I've known him, and started before that. I have a feeling the wifey's biological clock is somehow involved, but good luck to Rob in his cessation endeavors.

That's all. In exactly one week I will be done! I might be going to a 2-day class the last week of June (coffee & Lunch provided) to learn how to teach high-level stuff to...well, tech kids. It sounds kind of interesting, even though I'll have just stopped working. But it'll be a jeans and sneakers kinda day, so whatever. I love going to classes, so this won't bother me too much.

(Hee hee. Another 4:20 post).

Weekends in my World

What I love about my weekends is that I never quite know what is going to happen. For instance, my aunt and uncle from CA are out dealing with his sick mother, so I got to see my aunt and eldest cousin briefly. Well, my aunt and mother are actually butchering a piece of classical music on the piano in our dining room at the moment, but I really think that is besides the point.

But before all that, I enjoyed dinner out with my mother and aunt on Friday, followed by grocery shopping and lunch and picking up the cousin on Saturday. Mom and I had a non-hockey-puck steak dinner on Saturday night, much to A's chagrin, 'cause she wanted me to go out with her but I just didn't feel like it. This largely because of a visitor I had Saturday afternoon. ANYWAY!

So today, Mom & I got up at the butt crack of dawn and mosied over to the flea market we like to go to. I walked away with another tea pot (Bavarian!) two 1983 comic books for Return of the Jedi and two 1980 trading cards for The Empire Strikes Back. I corrected a whole slew of papers, had a Boddingtons, went in the pool and had a yummy dinner.

I have 7 working days remaining. And the hiccups (yay wine!).

A little something to hold you over, until my brain can work again

Greatsword You preferred a weapon with 58% power over speed and 49% range over melee.

You use a Greatsword. Do the words Zweihander or Flamberge mean anything to you? You prefer a Greatsword, a massive, heavy blade frequently strong enough to cut down the rides of mounted warriors. Though slow, the impressive length and heft of a greatsword makes it capable even of breaking through armor. Your enemies will run from the deadly arcs of your blade as you bear down on them.

Link: The What's Your Signature Weapon Test written by inurashii on Ok Cupid